Anonymous wrote:Good for you. Enjoy your nursing home. You realize they will inherit it. I'd prefer to see my kids live more comfortably rather than them inherit it when they are much older and don't need/cannot enjoy it as much.

Not if OP’s will says otherwise.

Good for you. Enjoy your nursing home. You realize they will inherit it. I'd prefer to see my kids live more comfortably rather than them inherit it when they are much older and don't need/cannot enjoy it as much.

I bet you would change your tune if you had a large estate. The vast majority of parents prefer to hand their assets onto their children and grandchildren rather than to Uncle Sam or charities or anyone else. What the hell would you do if you had tens of millions of dollars? Just give it all to charity? I don't think so. Get real.

Anonymous wrote:If you just forget for a second though that that other OP and her Dh got their money from family, and reframed the question regardless of where the money came from. Imagine, it was money each person earned from a job and the wife had used all her money towards things that benefit the whole family included Dh but the Dh refused to use any of his money to benefit his own immediate family. That’s what that OPs question is really about. The fact that they both got the money from inheritances and family is really irrelevant to the question.

Not irrelevant at all. She's not working. All of his income goes to the family. You can't just erase that he's the breadwinner to make him look like a miser because he's trying to set aside a windfall to make a cushion for a known future issue. That OP is ridiculous and so is this attempt to paper over her terribleness.

The thread in reference https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1109442.page

If you just forget for a second though that that other OP and her Dh got their money from family, and reframed the question regardless of where the money came from. Imagine, it was money each person earned from a job and the wife had used all her money towards things that benefit the whole family included Dh but the Dh refused to use any of his money to benefit his own immediate family. That’s what that OPs question is really about. The fact that they both got the money from inheritances and family is really irrelevant to the question.

Anonymous wrote:Troll.

The husband in question is frugal for himself so he can save for the care of his disabled brother. He is being responsible and the opposite of selfish.

What's wrong with you?

I'm pretty sure this OP is referring to the wife (the OP of that thread) and the money she got/ is getting from her family.

Anonymous wrote:The people I know that get money from their parents are out of touch. Nice people but just divorced from reality. Like talking about a really expensive vacation that one couldn't afford from where we work or they say daycare costs are no big deal because their parents cover it. They just don't seem to have any perspective about how fortunate they are and they don't seem to grasp that not everyone gets financial assistance like that.

OK I am one of those people. How would you prefer we approach the situation to other people? At the time that I’ve been upfront about having money from family it feels like people take it the wrong way. When I don’t, it feels like people think how you would think. I’m very well aware of the other people do not have the same financial advantage. I honestly don’t really talk about it much except with other people that I know I have the same situation.

Anonymous wrote:Troll.

The husband in question is frugal for himself so he can save for the care of his disabled brother. He is being responsible and the opposite of selfish.

What's wrong with you?

+1, the OP of that thread is acting entitled to someone else’s inheritance.

Raise your kids right, I don’t personally care who you leave your money to but you gotta leave it to someone so it makes sense that a lot if people leave it to their kids.

Anonymous wrote:The people I know that get money from their parents are out of touch. Nice people but just divorced from reality. Like talking about a really expensive vacation that one couldn't afford from where we work or they say daycare costs are no big deal because their parents cover it. They just don't seem to have any perspective about how fortunate they are and they don't seem to grasp that not everyone gets financial assistance like that.

I live in a wealthy suburb on a relatively low income, and all my neighbors think nothing of paying for what you mention - out of their own salaries, of course, since they're high earners.

I think you're find that the rich *in general* will seem out of touch when conversing with people who have less. Earning your own money doesn't protect you from cluelessness when it comes to the lower-income population.

Anonymous wrote:The people I know that get money from their parents are out of touch. Nice people but just divorced from reality. Like talking about a really expensive vacation that one couldn't afford from where we work or they say daycare costs are no big deal because their parents cover it. They just don't seem to have any perspective about how fortunate they are and they don't seem to grasp that not everyone gets financial assistance like that.

+1

Just to clarify are you saying you won’t gift funds over time yet still will leave money at your death? Or are you saying you will set them up to launch well and will leave any remaining money to charity at your death?

If it’s the latter, I 100% agree with you.

Troll.

The husband in question is frugal for himself so he can save for the care of his disabled brother. He is being responsible and the opposite of selfish.

What's wrong with you?

The people I know that get money from their parents are out of touch. Nice people but just divorced from reality. Like talking about a really expensive vacation that one couldn't afford from where we work or they say daycare costs are no big deal because their parents cover it. They just don't seem to have any perspective about how fortunate they are and they don't seem to grasp that not everyone gets financial assistance like that.

Like my parents did for me, I will pay for college, contribute a good amount to wedding, and maybe help with the first downpayment if they marry in their 20s like I did. Other than that, no private school, no cash gifts, nothing! Maybe 529s for grandchildren. Maybe. But I would not want an adult to be as lazy and entitled to their parents’ money as that OP is! I don’t care about the tax savings from gifting $34k each year, it’s not worth fostering that kind of dependence. Earn your own with the privilege you were given and live within that income dammit!