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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I dont know what it's like coming out of public in nyc, but coming out of private, you can be in the bottom 25% of the class and get into Tufts.

And maybe this is the value in private? It puts in a bottom. You may not be going to HYP but you won't end up at  (insert a college ranked 100 )[/quote]

A friend of mine has a daughter that grinded it out in a upper middle class nyc suburb.  all sorts of EC.  4.0 GPA.  good ACT score.   Tufts was the best school she got into.
(and loves it, which is important!).   tough 4 years.

versus being middle of the pack at a 2T school and getting into Tufts or being in the bottom quartile at a TT and getting into Tufts.

the optionality of a better college with the "floor" of tufts is worth $300k to me if the alternative is a miserable 4 years fighting for each .01 on GPA at a top suburban school.  
Others make a different choice.

[/quote]

Depends on what you do with the $300k from my experience. Many Ivy grads have to grind well into their 40's to make it worth it. Not everyone is going to reach the top of the pyramid in their field. [/quote]

it's just over 5% of our net worth (for two kids to private high school).    so while theoretically i understand the save $300k and put it into the stock market and give the kids $1mm when they graduate (although i think the math is less than $1mm but i get your point) - in reality that's not how it works for the majority of people putting their kids in private school.

do we love writing the $150k a check.  Nope.  but it's a one time (actually 4x) event.   we move on.  it's not really changing our lifestyle either way.  we don't really spend our earnings completely anyway.

and it's the floor of Tufts that was the discussion, the Ivy potentially - that was just the cherry on top if it happened to be the case.[/quote]

The suburb kid will come to learn grit and resilience through their HS experience, while you might have your child pick up rich kid habits (relying on parent's money) at the private HS. I don't think you will be able to magically turnoff the spending once you go down that path. They will want the same as their peer group. As an adult it takes a level of maturity to be able to handle the wealth disparity that is in your face while living in NYC, I don't know if I would want to subject my child (less mature) to it.

[/quote] I am pp.  grew up in the burbs. Loved it. And so agree on the kids.   On the one hand I feel like they are spoiled entitled kids but I don’t want them to go thru the suburban hs experience. (The college game part).

I don’t think the wealth thing in nyc as big of a deal.  We are comfortable. But not nyc wealthy.  Not even close.  But it doesn’t impact us day to day. [/quote]

It is fairly direct when people ask what you do for a living and where you live. Ask where you summer and if you are in the Hamptons on the weekend. The schools are also very direct with how they fundraise and seating arrangement at the gala.[/quote]

This happens in short hills Manhasset and Bedford too. [/quote]

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