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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My ILs and husband both end up taking twice as long to cook meals as they plan to - and the kids are a bawling tired mess by the time we eat. When I first saw this dynamic, I tried to intervene to resolve it, but what cook wants to be rushed and what kid wants to miss out on a special holiday meal with extended family?

Now I sit back and let it happen. I offer to help once. If I'm declined, then I give the kids milk when they should be eating, [b]but I don't make it my job to entertain an overtired, hungry set of kids, [/b]nor do I make it my job to micromanage a bunch of adults who know what the consequences of their actions will be. They know what they're doing - so I let them, and let them deal with the consequences.

It's really stressful for everyone else, but it's a mess of their own making and it's only manageable for me if I just throw up my hands and accept that I don't control these people. [/quote]

You're punishing your kids because your ILs and husband have poor time-management skills in the kitchen. It absolutely IS your responsibility to entertain/care for/FEED your kids at all times, especially in your in-laws' home. What kind of mother knowingly lets her kids be miserable to make a point?[/quote] Oh please!  They will live.[/quote] But it sounds like the only one having a meltdown here is the OP. I bet the kids were just fine. They are resilient and they adjust. There are kids with much more difficult circumstances who thrive. A missed nap is really a first world problem.

Yeah, sure they will survive.  But I don't simply wish to survive.  I would like to have FUN, too.  Dealing with hungry, cranky, overly tired meltdowns is no fun - so I will avoid those :wink: .[/quote][/quote]

But it sounds like the only one having a meltdown here is the OP. I bet the kids were just fine. They are resilient and they adjust. There are kids with much more difficult circumstances who thrive. A missed nap is really a first world problem. 
[/quote]

It is nice to recognize that around the holidays young parents have other social engagements to attend with their children.  Disrupting a young child's nap time and bed time might not seem like that big of a deal in the short term.  But when you consider the domino affect and how that child will then be extra cranky throughout the next day ...you realize that it is not just one day and not just your party that they are grouching through.

There is a method to our madness!  Schedules are important - especially with young children.  [/quote]

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