Reply to Stay at home Dad: My kids not accepted?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would and have reached out to dads for a playdate.  They were not stay-at-home dads, I just knew that they tended to be the parent to take the kid to the park on weekends.

BUT - and it is a big but - this would be for a playdate in the park, in the open, or an activity.  I would not invite them to the house where the dad and I would be the only adults.  If there were two women or someone else, fine.  [b]But not the two of us in the house. I'm uncomfortable with that.[/b] [/quote]

So you are worried about being alone in a house with the dad -- presumably, someone you know from school/neighborhood, not some random stranger -- when both of your children are playing in the next room? If you truly don't trust this person such that you would not be in a house alone with them, why would you let your child play with his in the first place, even if it is at a park?  You sound really paranoid to me.  I am pretty safety-conscious person, and I would not have a problem going to a play date at the house of a SAHD.  If the guy gave me the creeps for other reasons (inappropriate comments or something) then no.  But I wouldn't be uncomfortable just because - gasp! - he's male.  I don't appreciate it when people treat me a certain way based strictly on my gender, and I try not to do the same to others. [/quote]

Maybe I should rephrase. I am not worried about my safety.  And none of the dads I know give me the creeps.  They are all perfectly fine.

I am married. Everyone's marriage comes with boundaries and expectations.  In our marriage it is inappropriate to seek opportunities to be alone in the private house with members of the opposite sex.  Not because we can't control ourselves or anything but out of respect for each other's spouses and marriages. Public space together is fine. Private is not.

Ask your husband if he likes the idea of you hanging out in another man's house while your children play.  Mine doesn't so I don't do it. [/quote]

why can't you invite the kid over for a playdate when your DH is home then?

I don't think OP is like, jonesing for alone time with moms, just wondering why he doesn't get reciprocal invites.  I go on plenty of playdates where both parts of the couple are invited.[/quote]
That's a possibility, of course.  If the second parent is at home, then the issue is moot. I am just surmising, perhaps wrongly, that SAH parents tend to meet up when other parents are at work, and not at home. We've actually had a dad and his son over for a playdate on Sunday when both of us were home.[/quote]

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