Reply to S/O what kind of woman neglects the physical and emotional needs of her spouse

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[quote=Anonymous]Re: having sex when you don't want to. But the point is, if you are in a loving marriage, you should very rarely 'not want to.' No, I don't mean your libido is set at a constant go-go-go, but wanting to have sex with your spouse doesn't have to mean 'want to because I will expire from hormonal overload if I don't get laid.' It can also mean 'wanting to because having sex makes my partner happy and making him/her happy makes me happy' (or 'physical closeness to my partner makes me happy').

That's what I don't get about people who say they don't want to have sex with a spouse - even if your libido isn't raging, don't you get pleasure from making a loved one happy? (If you don't love/like your spouse, you have other problems in the marriage than just lack of sex).

To use an example from my own marriage (which has so far lasted 15+ years). Sometimes DH wants it and I give the 'go ahead' because even if my libido isn't raring to go, I enjoy giving him pleasure - it makes me happy and feel good. And sometimes it's the other way around.

Honestly, sex isn't always just about your pleasure, it's about enjoying your partner's pleasure too.[/quote]

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