Reply to Any Formerly SAHM's Back to Work for Economic Reasons and Hating It?

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Reply to "Any Formerly SAHM's Back to Work for Economic Reasons and Hating It?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]PP, you missed the point. My main gist was that proceed with caution. If your husband isn't 100 percent on board and you are not 100 percent on board with your choice to SAHM, choosing to be a SAHM can be problematic and lead to serious issues if your marriage implodes. Like I had explained upthread.[/quote]

Agreed.  Marriage is a partnership in which each person has a say, it's not just up to a wife to unilaterally decide she wants to SAH.  And just because a DH doesn't make enough to fully support a family with a middle class lifestyle ($$$ in the DMV area), doesn't mean he is not quality. Each spouse needs to carry their weight whether it be through childcare, household chores, etc. or earning an income (or combination of both).  I've had a female friend act as the primary income earner while her DH was in law school and working a low paying clerkship.  Now he's making $$$ at a firm, so she is a SAHM.  I also have girlfriends who work part time jobs, earn more than their spouse, etc. and they are in happy marriages.  At the end of the day, it's really about each partner contributing.

Would I love to quit my job and pursue other things that interest me more such as spending more time with my first baby once he's born in a few months?  Sure.  But it would be totally unfair of me since I make about the same as DH and we would be much less financially secure without two incomes.  I don't like my job, but I like that at 30 I am already vested in a federal pension and have a fair amount in retirement savings.  I like that I am climbing the career ladder at work and will be able to contribute toward my children's college funds.  And God forbid anything ever happen to DH, I will be able to continue to support our household.

This isn't to say that every woman should work and no woman should ever SAH.  Just make sure the decision is mutually agreeable and beneficial to your family, so your DH doesn't resent being an ATM.

Also, I find it funny how threads about men who become unemployed, stop looking for work, aren't contributing much financially to the home are considered deadbeats that the DW should leave![/quote]

Honestly,mouth can comment on this in an informed way until you have had a kid ir two.  Your priorities may Chang pe and you may find yourself at home for longer than you thought pre-kids, or not.[/quote]

You, not mouth.[/quote]

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