Reply to Just found out husband cheating he texted me instead of her by accident

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]get his phone and gather all the communications you can proving his infidelity. Do it now before he deletes everything. he knows where this is heading. what a fuck head. Why do parents (not always the dad, I know) do this shit to their kids? And they fact that he txted this person tells me there was no regret. And how in the hell did he txt YOU by mistake? [/quote]

YES YES YES!

Here are my suggestions:
1) agreed with- first thing is first. Dont freak him out. Act like you are willing to forgive him, so he doesnt try to cover things and delete things too quickly. Make sure to get as much "evidence" as possible. Screen shots, e-mails, look at your bills- are there questionable charges on his part. Get all your finances in a row. Get all account balances, write down everything. Start taking pictures of your home, room by room. So you know what was there at this very moment in case something happens to disappear later. Trust me.
2) Once you have all important documents, finances, evidence, etc. with you- take it to a trusted person's house. Say, family member or close friend. I would also include very special and important things like pictures, heirlooms, jewlery.
3) Sit him down and let him know you are leaving him. If you dont leave him, you are stupid. Not only did he not take accountability for what he did, he blamed you for it. He will never change and he will do even worse in the future. Trust me.
4) You stay with the kids. He goes. If you dont, he will have the advantage. DO NOT LEAVE THE HOUSE. he needs to leave. CHange the locks and get a lawyer ASAP. You may need to hire a PI to get more concrete evidence that a true affair is taking place but in the state of VA,  you will probably both get 50/50 custody. BUt, atleast, you have the advantage since he did this to you.

Good luck and stay strong. He sounds manupilative and I am pretty sure he is going to say what he needs to to have you stay and not divorce. DOnt buy that crap[/quote]

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