Reply to When did you decide it was time for an affair and did it help your marriage?

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Reply to "When did you decide it was time for an affair and did it help your marriage?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
Another wife here. This was exactly the thought process I went through, and decided I didn't want my H having sex with me out of duty.  An affair made so much sense.  I became calmer because I was being desired and receiving physical pleasure and H was much less tense around me, knowing I wouldn't push him for sex more than every week or ten days.[/quote]

There are seriously men out there that don't want to have sex with their wives?

What are their reasoning?

I can see if DW gained a lot of weight and isn't sexy anymore.  But if DW stayed in decent shape and had a high sex drive, why the hell wouldn't a man not want to be in his DW all the time?

As a man I can't imagine not having a sex drive.  That would scare me and I'd be at the Dr. quick fast.[/quote]

I don't know if there is any medication for women with low sex drives. Besides, OP SAYS his wife has a low sex drive. What if he's awful in bed and she can't put up with it any more? OP doesn't say if she is religious. Too many religions have brainwashed women into thinking they shouldn't enjoy sex and a lot of them have NO IDEA of how to have an orgasm by themselves, so they can't help their husband give them an orgasm.

Sex should be MUTUALLY satisfying.

OP seems to be seeking justification for cheating. There IS NEVER a justification. If you can't talk to your spouse about sex (not making them feel guilty or ashamed) then you have a communication problem. Just get a divorce and save your children the future trust issues.

OP is no innocent with regards to his wife's refusal to have sex or lack of desire.

I know if I'm upset with my DH, I'm not in the mood. But if I'm sick or have bad cramps, I'm not in the mood then either. If I'm having a crappy day and he wants to have sex, I do tell him, I'm not in the mood and boy, he knows how to get me in the mood! I rarely say no, but when I do, he knows there is a valid reason (like cramps). Occasionally 
he has told me no, and I don't take offense. I know when he says no, he must have a darn good reason. But we can communicate, something OP and his wife don't seem to be able to do.[/quote]

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