Reply to has anyone on here terminated due to a positive T21 result?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]once I see a heartbeat and the baby is moving around, that baby is alive.[/quote]

For me, once I see a heartbeat and the FETUS is moving around, that FETUS is a living parasite. I don't mean parasite in a gross way, but that's what a fetus is. It is living off of another living thing, and can't live independently.  I terminated. Aborted. Whatever you want to call it. I don't feel badly about the decision at all. We also have a first child, and one of the things we had to think about was how it would impact him.

I reached out to a girl I grew up with whose sister has Downs, and asked her about her experience growing up, and now with her, as adults. Obviously, she loves her sister very much. But what she described to me is not what I want for the child we already have. Her parents separated for a few years from the stress. She was teased relentlessly (which I found interesting because I remember her sister and remember everyone standing up for her and being kind to her). She didn't get much attention from her parents, who had to give so much attention to the other daughter.

We thought about what kind of couple we are, what kind of family we're trying to create, how comfortable we are bending that, how well a baby/child/teen with Downs would fit in, how much patience we have, etc. We thought about the very real possibility of having to care for this child well into their adult years, about the burden of caring for him/her falling to our older child. We made the right decision for us. I don't think anyone who chooses to keep a fetus that may have DS is making the wrong decision. It just has to be the right decision for you. [/quote]

I could have written the above. I was never in the position of being faced with this decision but did need to have an amnio due to earlier testing that suggested a higher likelihood of Downs. As I waited for results I thought about what I would do and my logic was exactly the same as the PPs. I was also living in another city at the time and hadn't told anyone about the pregnancy and delayed telling even longer as I waited for the amnio and its results because I did plan to terminate under those circumstances. Thankfully everything turned out to be just fine and we had a healthy second child.

I know several families through school and church whose lives are blessed by their children with Downs and I can absolutely understand why families would make those decisions but it just wasn't the decision that I felt would be right for my family.[/quote]

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