Reply to Already Depressed about Valentine's Day

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How are people so dense?! OP doesn't want to buy her own gifts or remember herself or celebrate her awesomeness. [b]She wants her DH to WANT to do those things for her. It's not about the damn flowers. It's about having someone recognize how special she is to him.[/b] Personally, I find it cruel when a spouse fails to do something they know matters to their spouse. And it's also cruel to make her suffer through her friends and family showing off what they got/did for V Day while she has nothing to show for it. It's a social event, and people ask. It's humiliating to tell people that your spouse didn't give a sh_t and came home with nothing that day. He KNOWS this matters to her. It's not like it's a surprise year after year. He's choosing to emotionally mess with her by refusing to participate. He sucks. [/quote]
Agreed.

Like, don't you like your spouse? If doing something literally so small as buying a box of chocs or a flower bouquet from the grocery store will make your spouse happy and you actively choose against it, why are you even with them? Can you imagine someone being like [b]"wow, my kid would love this $10 item. Oh well, f*** em."[/b] It's so unnecessarily harsh when the answer is such a simple fix. [/quote]

If this is truly your interpretation, it highlights where the issue is. You could just as easily choose to be unbothered by the fact that your otherwise-fine spouse didn't bring you a snack and/or a trinket, right? Instead, you'd rather take it personally (when there's no evidence that it's personal), and lash out and overreact like a toddler.

[/quote]
If you have never had the thought “wow, my spouse/child might love this” you are clearly not thinking about your spouse/child enough.

Point blank. Period.

Normal people think about their families and enjoy making them happy. If you do not, you should not have a family. Or probably be around normal society ever again.[/quote]

You clearly drank the hallmark holiday kool-aid. [/quote]
Being a kind caring spouse =/= hallmark koolaid. Some of us enjoy making our partners happy, thankfully vice versa. [/quote]

Forcing your spouse to buy you junk you don't need to prove their love or else you're gonna pout isn't kind or caring, it's manipulative and immature. [/quote]
No one is forcing anyone. If you choose not to do small simple things that make your spouse happy, you are a selfish person and don't care about your spouse. Whether it's valentines day or any other day of the week. Happy loving people like to make their spouses feel happy and loved, it's a very simple concept. [/quote]

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