Reply to Extreme resentment over mental load

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You can be free of the resentment whenever you choose to put it down.

I am the superior parent. Without my spouse, the kids would be okay. They have me. Without me, the kids are FOOKED. I win. I take pride in it. I don't sit and stew about how their other parent could never. I pat myself on the back because I can, and I did. If you're better with the mental load, GOOD FOR YOU.

Nobody can take advantage of your mental labor without your consent. You either need to restructure your household or reframe your mentality. The latter is always within your control.[/quote]

I love this reframing of this PP.[/quote]

Thanks! It also stops me from feeling guilty for "asking my partner to help". I do enough, and I deserve time off.

To the pp who says it's terrible, and there are no 'winners', sure, sure. But a little friendly competition tends to increase performance across the board. Maybe instead of making excuses for crap behavior, it could inspire a spouse to do more. If it doesn't work for you, that's fine. Go stew in your resentments. Not my life, not my problem.  :mrgreen: [/quote]

Farming it competitively like that just creates an awful dynamic for kids. You do you, though. It doesn't really sound "friendly", no matter how you try to reframe it. [/quote]

You're really upset about it, which means you should probably look at why another person's take got under your skin this way. Stewing in your resentments isn't good for the kids either. Whatever you choose, you need to find a way to make it work. Good luck. [/quote]

Not upset at all lol. Why do you keep insisting? Afraid of a little pushback? Sounds like you are the one with some issues to work through.[/quote]

Lil buddy, I'm good. You keep responding at me instead of responding to the point. I'm gonna let you do that. Best of luck with it, random anon who doesn't know me at all.[/quote]

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