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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Tell us the topic.[/quote]

OP here. I won't get specific, but she mentions a popular childhood book series she enjoyed. And she relates it back to her own life in a cheesy way. I can't think of a way to make it less cheesy, and I also don't think it relates to her life in a in a helpful or interesting way.

The actual writing/grammar is fine. The college counselor and teacher had her add more personal details, but I think the topic is just really cringey.  [/quote]

Okay, on this one I can help, my kid did a short answer essay that keyed off a favorite childhood book.  His high school counselor said, "sweet, but trite," very common and they aren't looking to admit 4 year old you.   She went on to list other topics/themes that have the same problems- 1) high school athletics interrupted by injury and 2) my grandma/grandpa is my hero (they also aren't looking to admit your grandpa).  I wouldn't have thought of it that way but it made sense, they are trying to understand/compare 17 year old to see how they might grow and contribute in a field of other 17/18 YO's so topics highlight childhood or other people rather than current/future person are starting off at a big disadvantage.  Sorry your school counselor didn't help you out on this one[/quote]

My (non athleic) kid wrote about a fairly minor sports injury that changed their life.  It was a great essay, funny, with a twist that tied into their future major.

They got into nearly every school they applied to, including several top 10 schools.[/quote]

Interesting. Sports Injury is on the top of most lists about what NOT to write about, along with death of a loved one, making or not making a team, etc. [/quote]

I am a senior scholarship application reader at a high school.  I literally have to force myself to grade sports injury essays fairly. By realizing how important they are to the writers. And evaluating the prose for grammar and flow.  The topic is dull and reminds me of bad priorities.  My kids have a number of athlete friends with overuse injuries who won't take it easy.[/quote]

I posted earlier about my non athletic kid writing about a sports injury with a twist, who got into multiple top schools.

I think you would have actually enjoyed my kid's essay.  It was hilarious, the injury was very unusual but very funny, and the essay connected the future major to the injury story in a way that had nothing to do with sports or injuries.

That being said, I think that admissions should give these sports kids a bit of grace.

Surely, the sports injury essays are a much easier read than the upper middle class affluent northern Virginia kid with two parents and their own car trying to find ways to write about how oppressed their life has been or inclusive they are.  After the 750th essay trying to out angst everyone else, I would think a good Tommy John's surgery essay would be a breath of fresh air. [/quote]

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