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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]8:06 - I am sorry for your parental situation. It is good you were able to rise above and just do it for yourself. I think you do acknowledge you aren’t typical.

I was similar in the not really needing my parents to guide/motivate me. I just did what I did. It wasn’t hard for me. Now, my parents were involved, loving, etc, but I was just self motivated, self assured, all of it.

I married someone who took the harder path - Barely graduated hs, got in with a terrible crowd. He enlisted and the military time did help him quite a bit. He started college, did very well, and in the end finished a degree in electrical engineering.

Our first child just has struggles AND is hard headed (a trait she inherited from both of us). We have tried and tried to help her. HS just didn’t go well, no matter how hard we worked with and for her.

Our second is still pretty young, but doesn’t seem to have the same problems in school. We hope she doesn’t need the same kind of constant monitoring her big sister did.

We all have our challenges. Be thankful for your fairly easy kids and I do hope that you have made peace with your crappy family situation.[/quote]

Thanks for the kind words and you have perceived the situation well. I didn’t have any relationship with my parents (divorced) as they had too many negative behaviors. Just the card I was dealt.

I have empathy for those with kids who find things difficult. I can see where at some point you have to embrace them no matter what. Again I can also see where my parenting views are odd. If I had kids who needed more help I am sure I would have pitched in. But I live by the rule of applying only the minimum dosage of medicine, so to speak. Agree with your point on being lucky - although I chose wisely with my spouse - a daughter of a Holocaust survivor - there was some baggage to wade through but an exceedingly intelligent person who obviously passed on a lot to my kids. Don’t get me wrong - having kids is not in any way a genetic experiment but without any parental role models she made things easier for me. I am far more risk averse than I would like to admit. [/quote]

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