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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We know a family who recently had a child die of cancer. The kid went from healthy and happy to dead at 16 in 11 months. It was vicious and horrible and involved all kinds of anguish and suffering. The child's mother created a Caring Bridge site and she detailed the abominable suffering her child had gone through the night before. Some fool commented on the description by saying "God doesn't give anyone more than they can handle". It was a prime example of how trite religious sayings spew forth from well intentioned people yet have awful consequences. I just can't imagine being a big enough jackass to dare say something like that. It was completely emotionally tone deaf to a frightening degree. 
A merciful God wouldn't do that to a child. He also wouldn't let kids starve or anyone get ALS or whatever. [/quote]

So, the alternative is to believe that the child's suffering was random and pointless. Is that better? But I agree the message was awful.[/quote]

DP, but yes I think acknowledging the complete randomness and unfairness of it is more validating to a parents’ suffering than suggesting God is killing their child painfully because they can “handle it.” It’s okay for a parent to share that cancer treatment really sucks and to agree it is terrible and sucks. The only one who feels better after saying it is God’s will is the poster who wants some tidy answer about God being in charge.[/quote]

No sane person would ever say that to grieving parents but this is about what the parents believe. Again if you think it being random is validating and all that, great for you. But don't be so shocked that it doesn't work for many people. And don't be shocked that those who have faith can weather more storms.[/quote]
People have said this, and pp posted about it on the previous page. It's a horrific thing to say, but that's what many religious people have and do say to others suffering.

Laughable to the last sentence. Sticking your head in the sand and waiting for magic sky daddy to save you isn't weathering any storm. [/quote]

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