Reply to Considering Transition to a Stay at Home Mom

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[quote=Anonymous][quote] I always hear this as the rationale to continue working, but I also know that in nearly every case where a divorce happens, whether or not the wife works, there is a massive financial blindsiding, given that so few people (in this region particularly because of the high housing costs) live on their income solely and live below their means. So the families with an HHI of $400k where the wife brings in $150k and DH $250k - they are as screwed as the SAH family with same HHI because the dual working family cannot maintain 2 households on that income. [b]Either way, your life is blowing up and everything you thought was your financial reality has to change massively.[/b] The risk of divorce in a stable marriage is always there. That should not be your primary deciding factor.[/quote]

I don’t see how this makes sense.

There are 3 sources of support post divorce: half of assets, alimony, and your own salary. The first two are highly dependent on a non jerk spouse + a judge ruling in your favor. The only one women truly control is their only salary. And when women have no incomes of their own, husbands often prolong negotiations knowing the wife can’t pay the legal fees. And divorces can take years.

If my life were thrown into the blender of divorce, I would at least want my own salary to keep me afloat. Former SAHMs don’t have that, which is why absent family money it can be tough for them. [/quote]

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