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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.

I am surprised this thread took off. To be clear, I did not mean that people in big law should never complain to anyone about their jobs, or that it is not an objectively tough career, or that I made perfect choices in my life (far from it!). I am actually a pretty empathetic person and will frequently serve as a sounding board for my friends and neighbors.

Everyone complains about things that are hard sometimes!

However, complaining and then following up with how despite how miserable you are, there is no way to change your circumstances is another thing entirely. It's especially egregious when your audience is a person or group of people who undoubtedly make way less money and you are specifically saying you can't do something different because it's impossible to live on less money, so you have no other options. I do not live in a super expensive neighborhood for DC so I challenge the notion that people would need a big law salary to pay their mortgage, though I get that everyone's finances are different. I am not saying it's easy to make a lateral move but most attorneys in this area have tons of options, especially compared to people without advanced degrees.

That's all! [/quote]

Per your OP your family objectively does make good money though even if less than biglaw money.  I ballparked your HHI at around $275K earlier, the people complaining may not have the ability to have an HHI that is that high and may not be able to stay in the neighborhood if they take the jobs that are available to them.  You can't really separate the pay cut you took from the fact that your spouse also makes good money.  I guess it is a choice that people marry nurses and teachers that don't make a ton of money but you don't necessarily know their personal circumstances.[/quote]

A Big Law attorney who left for a government, non profit, small law position could easily still make 150k, and a teacher or nurse in this area can definitely make 75-100k. So even if you were married to a lower earner, if you are a lawyer with the background that enables you to get a Big Law job, you can still definitely live within OP's general income level.

So actually... OP is not in some magic situation where she's just so luck because her spouse is a super high earner. This area is full of dual earner couples making around 250k off of pretty ordinary jobs where they each earn between 100 and 150k. Especially once people get into their 40s.[/quote]

PP here and I guess it just depends if those options are actually available.  Government is pretty hard to get so I wouldn't assume that is a readily available option.  I also wouldn't assume the comp at a non-profit or a small firm would be $150K, could be closer to $100K so you could be looking at a $75K - $100K difference in comp than OP.  I agree there are a lot of couples in the income bracket you mentioned with ordinary jobs, it just might not be the case that the folks complaining have options that put them there.  [/quote]

Y'all are really twisting yourselves into knots in order to defend the ridiculous-on-its-face notion that a Big Law attorney making 300k+ is trapped with zero option and deserving of all the sympathy one has to give.

This is silly.[/quote]

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