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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your mother has obvious issues.

But I do relate to her request that you focus on the call when you are talking to her (she probably looks forward to that all week).

I hate when people multitask when they are supposedly giving you their attention. It is obvious, and hurtful.

But, you need to tell her ahead of time how much time you have for the call. Set a timer, and tell her sorry that you need to do X.

As a mom, I think 45 minutes or one hour is not that much for two people to connect once a week (i.e., explain all of their news, especially if you have children). But regardless you are allowed to set boundaries. I think you should tell her in advance so she can prioritize her topics. [/quote]

OP here. The 45 minutes is the problem. Even if I say I have only 45 minutes and need to end the call at X time, that is not ok. My mom wants to literally talk for 2-3 hours or more until she has something else she’s looking forward to (a TV show, dinner) come up. The whole reason I posted is because she throws a crying tantrum if I say I “only” have a certain amount of time to talk and when I say I have to go.[/quote]

Sorry. she obviously needs more in her life and probably therapy.

There are online options, but she may not be willing to explore that.

You cannot fix her.

Just decide what you are willing to give (timewise) and respect yourself enough to honor that. Perhaps send a letter (snailmail) explaining why you need to set boundaries. But know you are allowed to do that, for your own mental health

She may never understand, but that is okay. You need to figure your life out, not hers. [/quote]

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