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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had my son when I was 30. He was a very high needs baby/toddler and I learned quickly not to disclose this to many because there was so much condescending advice from parents with easy babies. It really, really bothered me when I was struggling.
So far though I have found more often it's moms of 3+ in general (young or not) who are smug when their kids are in the under ~12 ages. Not sure why. I'm one of 4 and my mom did it largely on her own while my father worked long hours. It wasn't a cake walk. Most moms of 3+ I know have A LOT of help but act like they know/do so much more. I know it's not the case though so I ignore it. [/quote]

I’ve noticed this as well. Many people seem to think raising 3 kids means they know everything about all kids, regardless of whether they started having them younger or older. [/quote]

Hmm.  This is interesting and I’m reflecting whether people think this is true about me.  [b]I do offer a lot of advice to younger parents.  My experience with three is that there is a wide variation in kids’ temperaments and development, and if you only have one or two, you might not have that perspective[/b], so I try to tell people that they shouldn’t feel bad if X didn’t work for their kid.  Kids are  like flowers—some things are pretty universal like sun and water, but what works for a daisy won’t work for a rose bush or whatever., and no matter what you do to that daisy, you’re not going to end up with roses.  
[/quote]

This is my experience with moms of 3+ (or frankly even 2 if they were easy babies)... lots of advice and assuming they know more or have more perspective.... that, to me, comes across as smug. I was a teacher and saw plenty, I don't need someone whose sample size is 3 to tell me about development. [/quote]

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