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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had my son when I was 30. He was a very high needs baby/toddler and I learned quickly not to disclose this to many because there was so much condescending advice from parents with easy babies. It really, really bothered me when I was struggling.
So far though I have found more often it's moms of 3+ in general (young or not) who are smug when their kids are in the under ~12 ages. Not sure why. I'm one of 4 and my mom did it largely on her own while my father worked long hours. It wasn't a cake walk. Most moms of 3+ I know have A LOT of help but act like they know/do so much more. I know it's not the case though so I ignore it. [/quote]

I’ve noticed this as well. Many people seem to think raising 3 kids means they know everything about all kids, regardless of whether they started having them younger or older. [/quote]

Hmm.  This is interesting and I’m reflecting whether people think this is true about me.  I do offer a lot of advice to younger parents.  My experience with three is that there is a wide variation in kids’ temperaments and development, and if you only have one or two, you might not have that perspective, so I try to tell people that they shouldn’t feel bad if X didn’t work for their kid.  Kids are  like flowers—some things are pretty universal like sun and water, but what works for a daisy won’t work for a rose bush or whatever., and no matter what you do to that daisy, you’re not going to end up with roses.  
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Why would you think it takes three kids to know this? I have a sort of crazy easy, independent, confident only child. People ask me how she got to be that way. My response is always “they come as they come and all kids are different.” Doesn’t take a genius or a bunch of kids to figure out that life lesson…[/quote]

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