Reply to I will never understand why nice couples with children get divorced out of nowhere

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[quote=Anonymous]“divorced for no reason” or “without even trying therapy”?

That’s what people probably think about me and my ex.  Even after the divorce I invited him over several times a week for dinner, to all the kids activities and even went out with him and the kids once a weekend. Many people didn’t even know we were divorced.

He probably tells his friends that he was such a nice guy he “let” me have custody because he travels for work a lot.

The real truth is that he was having sex with prostitutes, colleagues, pickups, etc., unbeknownst to me.  He also was stealing my prescription medication, drinking in secret and was undiagnosed bipolar.  Once I unravelled enough of the story to confront him, he denied everything and gaslit me for more than a year.

I invited him over to keep an eye on him and the kids until they were old enough to protect themselves in his presence.

Do you think I’m going to tell that story to anyone in my community? My children & I would be shunned. I only told a few friends and family members who I knew would believe and support me. I didn’t want to have to re-visit the trauma each time I told someone, so I limited that.

This all happened pre-Me Too, so maybe if it happened now I could expect more sympathy and support, but I doubt it. [/quote]

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