Reply to People with a lot of friends and a big support system -- how do they do it? (Question about sister)

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[quote=Anonymous]Some posters say that you have to give first before you receive. While this may be true in a lot of cases, it doesn't always happen.

When my parents were younger, in their 30s & 40s, they used to host fancy dinner parties for their friends a couple times per year. My mother is an excellent cook! These gourmet dinners usually consisted of 'amuse-bouches' and champagne on arrival, followed by a 3-course dinner with fine wines + dessert and coffee. My mother would do all the cooking herself, except the dessert, which was bought. My parents would pride themselves on being good hosts. They liked to make people feel welcome. They also loved dressing the dinner table with their best table linen, a beautiful dinner service, flowers, etc. They enjoyed that kind of thing.

My parents' friends all loved coming to these dinners! They brought a present for my mom and they had a good time. However, after a number of years my parents came to the conclusion that meals were never or hardly ever reciprocated. Usually about 8 to 10 guests would come to my parents house, but most of them never hosted anything. Putting on a great dinner with quality food and good wine is expensive and, although my parents loved doing this as a gesture to friends, they stopped hosting the dinners as it felt too one-sided in the end.

My father in his younger days was also generous and he would often buy a round at his local bar. Not everyone reciprocated when it was their turn and it became noticeable after a while ... Sometimes one gives but doesn't receive ...[/quote]

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