Reply to H accuses me of refusing to take the bar exam while solely caring for 8-year-old during pandemic

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Reply to "H accuses me of refusing to take the bar exam while solely caring for 8-year-old during pandemic"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Thank you everyone for your valuable and supportive input.

I just crunched the numbers and figured out that if I ramp up my practice to the max post-COVID, with careful budgeting and the inheritance expected from my dad I would actually be able to afford the mortgage payments on my own, without his help, even in the new expensive city where I too want to relocate. That really gives me a boost of confidence.

Yesterday I turned to this board to ask whether it was unreasonable of my husband to expect me to take the bar exam while taking care alone of our son during distance learning in the pandemic. But most PPs focused on the larger picture of our marriage and envisioned future living arrangements. I am really glad, because that has prompted me to reassess my desire to hang on so desperately to this marriage.

After realizing that I would be fine on my own I now feel the strength to stand up to him when he accuses me of purposely delaying taking the second bar. I can tell him in the face not to bully me anymore, and that it would be unrealistic to put our kid in front of computer tutoring for 6 to 8 hours per day. I really feel much better now. He can go ahead and divorce now if he wants to, because I will be fine either way.

[b]I know that it sounds pathetic that I needed to input of strangers to get this strength, but that's how it is. [/b]

By reading another thread on this forum (I rarely read DCUM, I guess I should do it more often ;-) I also realized that my resistance to the idea of a divorce was the result of my desire to have an ideal family, which in reality we have not had for approximately six years now and will likely never have again. So it is not like a divorce would deprive our son of an ideal family. I hope that I can be stress-free and strong on my own, and create a happy home for my son.

So thank you, PPs, for your collective wisdom and support. [/quote]

NO. OP, no.

It's not pathetic at all. When things are collapsing around you, there is a lot of dust and disorientation. You don't have a touchstone, and so we were the touchstone.[/quote]

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