Reply to Fiancé wants a "nicer" engagement ring?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]This is where an honest conversation with your girlfriend is the answer. It isn't hard to game the diamond industry, it's kind of a scam anyway. And I'm a woman with a beautiful ring I love. But as someone approaching 50 with a man I also love, boy does stuff like this pale in comparison to our kids, our future goals, how we feel around each other. We talked one day and he said one of the things he loved best about me was my "financial restraint", lol. And I understand. Men feel enormous pressure and guilt by our dumb society to show their love with these trinkets. Show your love by showing up for her, literally and metaphorically, every day (or most days). If you both value that, you'll make it. The ring is just window dressing.[/quote]

agree. I'm nearing 50 and while I definitely could upgrade now (bought a vintage sapphire/platinum ring for about 4k?) it doesn't really matter. I'd much rather drop 8-10k on an amazing trip with the kids, or put it away for retirement. I also don't care what others think about the size or price of my ring because I don't really run in those circles (though my job puts me in contact with wealthy people al the time).

you can get a nice ring for 8k, OP, but can you get on the same page with your fiancée--not just about this but everything? It could be that for whatever reason this is the thing she's fixated on but generally not materialistic, or could be a sign that she has a certain vision for her life--size of house, cars, etc--that is not realistic. What kind of wedding does she envision? that will also tell you something. [/quote]

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