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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Stop with the "we" bashing.  It's dumb.

It's a quarter million dollar family decision and kids are not equipped to handle it alone.  You guys aren't cute, aren't clever, and aren't exposing some Freudian-level genius analysis except some revelations about yourselves.

It's a completely legitimate way of speaking used by many normal, kind, practical, parents.

And no, I am not the PP.

So stop.

[/quote]

UVA Associate Dean of Admissions begs to differ.

http://uvaapplication.blogspot.com/2013/11/the-role-of-parents-in-process.html[/quote]

Then he is a petulent jerk about the issue of the use of a phrase also.[/quote]
So do the folks at Tufts:
https://admissions.tufts.edu/blogs/inside-admissions/post/for-parents-to-ed-or-not-to-ed/

I have adult friends who say “We are applying early decision, we just don’t know where yet.”  I have also spoken with parents absolutely convinced their son must apply early or he will have no chance of being admitted.  Please remember -“we” are not going to college.   Your daughter or son is heading off to college. As parents we can live vicariously through our children but not tether ourselves to them. It is the time to let your son take flight and soar.  Our job, as parents of Early Decision applicants or Regular Decision applicants, is to be sure to articulate any non-negotiable restrictions; like geography – distance from home, financial commitments – how much the family can afford to put toward college expenses, etc.  Then we need to take a deep breath and step back.  [/quote]

This information [b]is not helpful here[/b], and insulting the PP who used the phrase serves no purpose, even if backed up by every Dean on the planet and the American Psychiatric Institute.  All it does is discourages that person form participating in this open forum where they can share and learn.  "You" being "Right" is irrelevant, and in this case damaging and negative.  Don't address whether people agree with you or not -- address why it is appropriate or helpful to discuss.

I do not understand why people enjoy shaming others, especially in an anonymous forum. It's a sad and pathetic quality.

(see how that feels?  That's what you did to someone else who was only sharing their experience)[/quote]

DP. I think it actually is helpful here.....people occasionally need some feedback to help them gain the proper perspective.[/quote]

I guess this is where we disagree. I don't think it is your place to help someone "gain the proper perspective" unless they ask.  Being overweight is bad.  Should we tell people they are fat if they ask our opinion on which restaurant to eat in?

The PP who started it was rude IMHO.   "Listen to yourself." was the entirety of the post.  Are you claiming that poster was offering "some feedback to help them gain the proper perspective"? More likely just being a petulant, self-important jerk.

The second poster had a bit of empathy but included "I was cringing a bit inside reading it."

Regardless, I believe the idea that the use of this phrase is some kind of Freudian laser-like insight of an inappropriately involved parent is ridiculous.

I will stop here and wish you all a good day.  [/quote]

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