Toggle navigation
Toggle navigation
Home
DCUM Forums
Nanny Forums
Events
About DCUM
Advertising
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics
FAQs and Guidelines
Privacy Policy
Your current identity is: Anonymous
Login
Preview
Subject:
Forum Index
»
Family Relationships
Reply to "It’s like I don’t exist other than to hand off DS"
Subject:
Emoticons
More smilies
Text Color:
Default
Dark Red
Red
Orange
Brown
Yellow
Green
Olive
Cyan
Blue
Dark Blue
Violet
White
Black
Font:
Very Small
Small
Normal
Big
Giant
Close Marks
[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have a similar issue where I’m maxed out and dh travels a lot. My in-laws want us to visit every month on the only weekend dh ever has at home. I’m breastfeeding an infant so it’s not like dh can take the kids without me. Th[b]They refuse to visit our much larger house with a dedicated guest room.[/b]eir ask is so out of bounds. At one point I was ready to divorce dh over it. [/quote] I don't think you can use breastfeeding an infant as an excuse to keep your in-laws away from your baby for months on end. If you *must* be with your baby 24/7 and can not pump milk for your husband to take with him on the visits then you either go with him on these visits or you open your home to your in-laws once a month or you meet them in a neutral place like a restaurant. You can't set up an impossible scenario where your husband's parents can't get to know their grandkids because you are so, so tired and it is too much work. Your husband and your ILs would grow to resent the heck out of you. Luckily they are only little for a short time.[/quote] NP. Did you not read the above? In-laws aren't making the effort. Their only weekend together each month, with an infant, is definitely too much work in the above scenerio. [/quote] If the Op's husband is only home on one weekend out of the month and Op does not want to be the one dealing with the IL visits, then Op is going to have to "let" her dh take the kids to meet the in-laws at a restaurant (or wherever) for a couple of hours. Yes, the in-laws need to be the ones to travel and, yes, Op's dh needs to take the kid(s) out of the home to meet the in-laws - park, playground, nature center, mall, movie theater, restaurant - whatever may be an appropriate venue. Op can spend 2 or 3 hours relaxing at home, Op's dh can get some one on one time with his kids and parents, the grandparents can establish a relationship with their grandkids. OR the in-laws can come and take the kid(s) out themselves and spend some time with their grandchild(ren) while Op catches a break at home. What they can't do is put op on the spot to make that long drive to see them once a month or expect Op to "host" them while they visit with their grandchildren. I sort of get the impression that these folks would expect a meal and for Op to sit and chat with them half the day as opposed to bringing a meal and entertaining the kids while Op gets a break. Op has too much on her plate to be expected to entertain the ILs like that.[/quote]
Options
Disable HTML in this message
Disable BB Code in this message
Disable smilies in this message
Review message
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics