Reply to Raising your kids screen-free (or minimal screens) -- experience from parents with older kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My boys play a fair amount of video games, but they always prefer going outside to play. They play a good amount of board games and nerf wars & dodgeball in the basement when the weather is bad.

We never put strict limits on screens or made a big deal out of it. We don't harp on healthy eating nor count grams of sugar. Somehow they know not to sit around eating pop tarts & chips all day.

It's harder to parent & raise children who can recognize & live an overall healthy lifestyle of moderation than to siply say No, we don't allow screen time or sugar in our house. Those parents are the ones who have children stuffing their faces with candy & pop at friends' houses. [/quote]

This is us, we don’t have strict limits on these things either. My kids don’t throw fits for screen time or for candy. They love to play outside and are very active. If things change and they start sitting around watching spongebob and drinking mt dew, we will readjust. But for now, laid back works for us. [/quote]

Yeah, if their behavior starts to change, then we'll address, but my oldest is in college and my youngest is 10 so I'm confident that our approach works.

I love the parents who proudly state that their children don't play video games ever. Then they get around to adding they don't even own a game system. Congrats, I guess? My children have never forgotten to feed or walk the dog. I mean, we've never owned one, but my kids are so awesome for never forgetting to take care of it.[/quote]

Not sure I get the analogy. Gaming has been recognized by the WHO as a disease. There are tons of researchers, experts in the field of addiction, who research this. Social media leads to increased rates of depression and anxiety among teens. This is all documented by extensive empirical study and millions of dollars are being spent every year trying to address it. Shrug it off if you want, but I wouldn’t leave highly addictive things around kids with developing brains and hope they learn to moderate themselves. Addiction isn’t a matter of will. Addictive behaviors alter your brain chemistry and functioning.

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K. Video games aren't meth. lol  Obesity is a disease. I usually have cookies in the house yet none of us are overweight. And I don't hope my children don't become addicted to gaming. I model & teach moderation. I find it more impressive that a parent can teach their children to moderate screen time rather than one who just bans it. The dog thing was a joke. Your kids don't stay up at night gaming bc you don't have an xbox. Wow. My don't bc they are tired from playing outside all night and now playing monopoly in the same room as the addictive xbox. [/quote]

Some of our relatives have that line about teaching their kids moderation. They have three kids also, and every one of them loves their screens. One is a competitive athlete, one a dancer, etc. But as you go down the line to the youngest you see more and more issues with attention and developmental delays. You realize that the oldest got the least screentime and as more kids came, the parents resorted to screens as babysitters because they lacked the energy to engage with all three and to give the last one what they gave the first. Whether we are on vacation somewhere new or at their house, we inevitably see the kids zoning out in front of TV vs playing imaginative games or socializing, and there are definitely tantrums and family tension over how much it is used. The difference in birth order and screentime is also marked. The older one might pull out an art project. The middle is nearly always on a device. The youngest can’t sleep or self-soothe without videos and the parents just throw it at her to basically get a break.

Totally normal. But I think when you feel that defensive about rationalizing your parenting you need to take a look at why you feel that way.[/quote]

This.[/quote]

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