Reply to Are we reaching a point where getting married/having children/owning home is just to damn expensive?

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Reply to "Are we reaching a point where getting married/having children/owning home is just to damn expensive?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I'm in my mid-50s and have been giving this topic some thought lately. Now I live in flyover country, but bear in mind that even though the COL is lower, good, well-paying jobs are increasingly scarce.

When I was a girl growing up in the late 60s & 1970s, all my (widowed, working, Catholic) mom ever talked about was having me graduate college and then get married.  I was fortunate to have Social Security until age 18 and a small inheritance from a relative to ensure I graduated college debt-free. I lived at home until I got married a couple of years later. That was not unusual, and my job at the time would have made it very difficult to afford rent - though I could have gotten a couple of roommates and an apartment.

My kids are relatively young for my age and I have seen so much over the past 30 years regarding workforce changes and career fields disappearing. I never really discuss marriage and kids with my own children, except to say that those are goals for when one has achieved some career milestones, acquired some savings, and been in a loving relationship for an extended time.

We talk a lot about career options, owning one's own business, money management, avoiding debt, saving, etc. DH and I hope that each of our kids can graduate college without debt and the older two are on their way to doing that.

Overall, I would discourage my kids from marrying in their 20s and I would never have the conversations with my daughter that my mom had with me. It's very important to me that my kids have good educations, stable career options and no debt coming out of college. The world I see from this vantage point is not a kind one to young people starting out, even in flyover country. So yes, I do think marriage and family life will undergo some very significant changes over the next 5 to 30 years. It's unfortunate, but it's a reality we should recognize and deal with accordingly.[/quote]

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