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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op.  I was you about 2 years ago.  Sex isn't what it was, but there were reasons for it... his significant weight gain, he started traveling one week a month for work, leaving me with two young kids.  I also work full time.  His increased responsibilities at work led to less patience with the kids, and he'd yell at them all the time.  They'd come to me for comfort, and I constantly felt like I had someone needing something from me.  Then the kids would go to bed (not with his help) and suddenly he'd want his turn with me.  I just needed like 30 minutes without someone touching my body, and he took that as rejection 
There are a million things we could have done better to save our marriage.... but he had an affair with his assistant who travelled with him in all his work trips.

Also denied it after I found incriminating texts.  Gaslighted me.

We did try therapy but he refused to acknowledge the affair.  I played the pathetic "pick me, pick me" dance for a solid year, which I regret terribly now.

Divorce sucks.  'It Is financially devastating.  It's terrifying.  You lose access to your kids half the time.

But..... you can do  this. my belief is that unless the cheater is willing to table his transgressions in therapy, attone for them and work through them so the two of you as a couple can address everything about your marriage, there is no hope.  None,  your marriage is over.

Don't waste another day in this situation,  give him an ultimatum. [/quote]

I dont get this, as a woman, did you initiate later that night or early in the morning? Or did you just let sex die? I don't get the weight gain thing either, its normal for older people to gain weight.[/quote]

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