Reply to Is anyone raising a teen diagnosed with oppositional defiant disorder?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The type of home life and parenting that is required for kids with ODD to be successful is often the type that parents just don't want to do and I don't blame them.

A very small world and consistent routine for years on end is what can be very helpful. This can mean no sports, no classes, no extras on the weekends, same school, same camp (if needed) every year.  Weekends have to have the exact same routine.  Not a lot of outings and if there are they must be the same ones all the time.

Even when parents manage to do that, what can happen is that their child's behavior stabilizes because they child's anxiety has been greatly reduced and they feel "in control".  It's of course an artificial control bc it's the parents scheduling that makes the child's life so rigid.  But parents see their child stable and assume he/she is now ready to do all the things NT peers can and it's not the case. There is always the option of introducing something new in the schedule but the adjustment period can be long. [/quote]

Is there ANY support for this at all? Severely restricting an "ODD" teenager like this seems like a recipe for severe rebellion.[/quote]

This has to start early and can't just suddenly start in teenage years. Or it could, but it would be really tough for the first few months.

Remember that a child with ODD is likely to have other comorbid issues as already pointed out. They are not NT kids and the parenting for these kids has to be different. Vastly different. [/quote]

Maybe, but I still can't see how any therapist would recommend basically socially isolating a child or being so rigid. I get that routine is important, and reducing stimulation/over-scheduling might be important too. But what you describe sounds extreme, and not likely to work for a teenager even if it does for an elementary student.  [/quote]

You are thinking about this from the perspective of a parent of an NT child.

First, this is by no means social isolation.  The child would attend school and would be out and about in the world with the family.  I am sure that something like a class/activity  could be added in but it can't be like with an NT kid where you might switch to different classes or do different activities a few times a year.  That's what makes joining the activities/sports/classes  so hard, they don't last long enough and aren't consistent with the same kids for years on end.  A very anxious child doesn't deal well with ever changing situations even if that change is once every 10 -12 weeks.

[b]It is rigid, structured and very controlled but for a highly anxious child or teen all of that adds up to the predictability they need to feel comfortable and helps to diminish the need for the oppositional behaviors.
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+100  Typical children and adults would find the structure confining but an ODD child actually flourishes with structure and "rigidity".  This dichotomy is what makes it so difficult for parents of an ODD child to understand and, frequently, why the uneven parenting compounds the child's issues rather than supports their resolution.[/quote]

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