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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]All of these NCS post are a tad depressing. I have a DD at Beauvoir and while we were (and still are not) set on NCS, I would be lying if I said one of the attractive things about Beauvoir was the feeder relationship (opportunity to apply early admissions) with the other schools on The Close and NCS' supposedly highly regarding reputation. After reading thread after thread after thread about NCS (and most of them seeming to balance on the negative side) I am really worried if my DD would be happy there. Yes, I know she will be academically challenged, but will her spirit be crushed by what sounds like such a mean spirited environment? What's even more odd is when I talk to the young ladies who are there now, who attended Beauvoir, they all say how much they like it. When I ask their parents how it is going, there are a few who say there were some rough social years but once their DD found her group things improved drastically. This all seems like so much to put on the shoulder of girls.

Is this the norm in the independent school world? Or is it truly just a NCS thing?[/quote]

I don't mean to tell you how to live your life but if you have access to actual NCS students and families, why would you turn to an anonymous forum that includes comments made by people with no connection to the school? My daughter really enjoyed her time at NCS. I'm sure if you attended some of the games or performances and struck up a conversation with the girls, you would learn everything you need to know.[/quote]

Agreed.  My daughter is in the US now at NCS and loves it.  I do not recognize the school that is described in the negative posts.  In my daughter's experience, the school and the girls are incredibly supportive.  Then again, if someone says they have a daughter at NCS who doesn't like it, I believe them.

Fortunately for you, because your daughter is already at Beauvoir, you and she should be able to figure out firsthand whether NCS is right for her.  Do not base your decision on posts in this thread, even mine.[/quote]

PP here is something to consider: My DD attends NCS and struggles socially but does not want to consider attending another school.  She would likely give you the impression that she loves her school and would not change a thing. As her mother, I know that this is not true and that she is having a difficult time finding her way and making strong connections.  My advice to current Beauvoir parents is to be honest about where your DD is in the social chain because it's not likely that this will change once at NCS, even adding new girls. [/quote]

Interesting, and I have heard this from a few parents. What I have not heard is whether they believe it is because of something unique to NCS, the private school world, just being a young girl, etc. and whether they think this issue could be resolved by changing schools or could have been avoided altogether by choosing another private school (or even public). Perhaps there is no answer because it would all be speculative anyway.

But for your child, so what are doing? Letting her stick it out and find her way? I can only imagine how hard it might be to sit back and watch it but not be able to do much to help fix it. As for the "social chain" what exactly do you mean? Do you mean, where we are financially or do you mean where she is in terms of popularity and friends? [/quote]

I was referring to where she is in terms of popularity. Although this will be the case no matter where we choose to enroll our DC, I think families overlook this because they assume that 5 years of friendships at BVR will translate well.  There is much to be considered, not all children move on to Cathedral schools.  What if the closer friends made a different school choice? Sure there may be time to keep those connections outside of school but not having a core group of friends during the day is tough on a young girl.  There are plenty of naysayers and deniers but I know this as truth not just for my family.  The teachers are wonderful at doing their best to guide and support the girls but they admit to be unaware of many social dynamics until it emotions spill over in some cases.

I am hoping this is not the case for all private schools, if so, our options will be severely limited. We are employing a combination of supports such as counseling, teaching DD how to respond in difficult and hurtful situations and keeping an eye out for a better option.  NCS is a great school but I will not sacrifice my DD's emotional and mental health for it, even if she doesn't understand it.[/quote]

I hope things change for your daughter. You sound like a wonderful parent and very thoughtful and she is lucky to have you. Is your daughter in the lower school? I wish I could help. My daughter is in the lower school. My only advice from personal experience with my other child at a different school is to keep reaching out and help them find friends with simiar interests and personalities. Hopefully she will find her true group or even if she has a few close friends that will help. Best of luck.[/quote]

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