Reply to What do you do when your adult child goes into therapy and lays blame at your feet.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][/quote]
If adult kids are trying to make sense of their childhood, let them.[/quote]

My experience is that if something feels off in the family of origin, there is a good reason(s) and it is important for people to divulge information until things no longer feel off.  Sometimes, parents [i]and[/i] adult children have equally contributed without malice intended.

I come from a family of neurodivergent people, my father had affairs that were hidden from some family members but not others and both of my parents had many narcissitic traits. When all of this information finally came to light after decades of being stressed in my family of origin, I finally felt peace because all of it hung together.  Not knowing what was wrong made it impossible to find peace. 
 [/quote]

There is no “let them,” do you get it? They are adults, they are doing what they want and need to do, whether you like it or not. There’s no “let them,” there is only you choosing to listen to them, reflect on what they have to say, and maybe accept some responsibility, apologize, and work on doing better. But know that there is no “let them” when it comes to another adult seeking therapy or or perspective. That’s their choice, that has nothing to do with you. [/quote]

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