Reply to In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My daughter will have many birthdays God willing and will we celebrate each one? Probably not. Will we celebrate the first? Absolutely! Why? Because she will have many other birthdays that she will forget and that others will forget. But it was important for me (yes ME)i is to have our all of our family together for at least one. And for us that was her birthday. It was the only time aside from our wedding that both of our families have all been together.

Sure they visit her once a month and that's really nice but like I said, it is important to me to have our family together for gatherings and since we don't do it often, this one was important. There is no need for personal attacks. [/quote]

No need for personal attacks... except your own, on your in laws, of course. Plus the hand-wringing about how your husband's parents didn't bend to your specific wishes about your 1-year-old's birthday party. It's the only time THUS FAR that both your families have been together. If it's important to you to have family gatherings, host more family gatherings. If it's a priority to your family, they will show up. That your in laws called your husband to tell him they wouldn't be making it to the party tells us that a) they are communicating in a way that most of us would appreciate (I say this as the person who is the default communicator with DH's divorced parents, and it's a lot of work and quite annoying, even for someone who prioritizes family) and b) they knew that you would react in exactly the way you're reacting.

You have a baby. It's a rough ride, but you know what? It isn't going to get less rough with this kind of attitude. If your husband's parents make an effort to be involved in your daughter's life regularly (even monthly is regular to a lot of us - I see my parents once a year if that), that means more than whether they show up to a party that your child won't remember. Do not alienate them over this. You will regret it.[/quote]

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