Reply to Wife having mid-life crisis and not sure how to respond

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[quote=Anonymous]Hey, I'm a NP here.  My advise is that this is her issue, not yours, and while it is nice for you to find a solution, I would recommend that you make her "feel heard."  Listen to her talk, really listen to what she is saying, without offering a solution. It is hard because I am tempted to offer a solution and it is hard to contain the impulse.

I would avoid linking her up with a job.  If she doesn't like it, she will blame you later.

She needs to do the "hard work" herself and figure out who she is, what makes her happy. This can be an area of tremendous growth and discovery.

Personally, I am someone who probably felt like a 3 out of 10 in the looks department (even if other people didn't think of me that way) and had such insecurity since when I was a kid that I aimed to have my self-esteem based on grades/education/learning/achievement, so on some level, now being in my 40s, I feel spared some of the "my looks are fading" issues of people who are 7 out of 10s or whatever.

Just be there for her. And let her find a good therapist to talk to.

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