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[quote=Anonymous]Before reading any of the thread, based just on OP, I wonder if maybe coming at this from an approach that is a place of hurt rather than anger might resonate best. Because let's be honest, anger is caused by hurt and there is no shame in admitting sadness.

Could you sit down with your father and his girlfriend and say "Please hear me out before speaking" so you aren't cut off before finishing. Could you say, look, we all make our choices and live our lives but right now, this is not something that is really healed for me yet. I know that might not seem like the right answer to you but I can;t be anything but honest. This is something that still causes me pain and anxiety with regard as to how to handle this new dynamic and I can;t make that go away any faster, its just going to happen in its own time." I wouldnt get into when you think it will, or if you never want it to, etc. that isn;t really relevant for the wedding. In that context you could appeal a bit to his GF that you aren't aiming to be malicious or vindictive but that it just feels like it will be painful and cause anxiety on the day that should be about joy.

I know its always easy to demonize the OW. To be sure some people are pure shit. But a lot more people, in my experience, are just very flawed. She might be a narcissistic monster but she also might be someone with poor choices, bad judgement, big issues, etc. that is able to see what is happening and bow out gracefully because she doesn't want to cause hurt. Its worth a try right?[/quote]

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