Reply to Lack of Sex starting to cause issues/fights

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Lack of Sex starting to cause issues/fights"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You say she is upset and feels rejected by you and that is why she is picking unrelated fights.  How do you know this?  How do you know that she wants you to desire her even though she is obviously pained when you give her attention?  Maybe you are misdiagnosing the problem?  Maybe she is doesn't care that you don't desire her, but is mad at you for other reasons?[/quote]

This is always a real possibility.

The reasons I've diagnosed it this way are:

- I've been the recipient of a lot of cards and notes and such lately (not just on VD day) to the effect of "thanks for being such an amazing husband and dad".

- [b]All of those have contained references to getting our sexual relationship back on track.[/b]

- the fights/arguments are pretty few, but they are always off-scale for the issue at hand, and make me believe something else entirely is going on - I've tried taking them at face value, and can't make them add up.

- the tiffs have ended in comments about not wanting to spend time with/be with her (our lives outside of work are spent entirely together).
[b]
- at least one of these "tiffs" was specifically relating to me very explicitly that she is concerned that I'm going to lose interest in her if we don't start having sex.

I think a bunch of it is guilt or feeling inadequate even though I'm not really pushing for anything...she's projecting a lot of frustrated desire onto me.[/b]  [/quote]

Uh, yeah.

This is pretty easy.

Sounds like she doesn't really want to have sex either, but she's afraid you are going to lose interest.

Sit her down, and be like, I just want you to know, it truly does not bother me that we aren't having sex.  Take all the time you need to feel better.  Don't worry about it anymore.

That will solve it. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics