Reply to I am not sure I can live with my son anymore.

Forum Index » Tweens and Teens

Reply to "I am not sure I can live with my son anymore. "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I could have written your story.  It has been my life for so long.  First, I am so sorry that your whole family is going through this.  My son is now 21.  We have been struggling since he was 12.  We have dealt with numerous mental health professionals on his behalf.  For the last several years he has refused any kind of therapy or medications, but we have continued to see a therapist for advice in transitioning him to adulthood.   Throughout the years, his various diagnoses have been ADHD, ODD, Depression, etc.  He has had every intervention you could imagine.  Nothing has really made too much of a difference.  It has been, and continues to be so, so exhausting.  His time in college has been filled with drugs, alcohol, and recently he has dropped out.  Until recently, he flat out refused to get a job.  That was really the final straw.  We have cut him off financially, which has not been a pleasant process.

Please do not listen to the people who are breaking you down.  They lack empathy and any real understanding of what you are dealing with. We have done everything that they chastised you for not doing and it has MADE NO DIFFERENCE.

The only advice I will give is this. Tolerate No Violence or Destructive behavior.  We have had to call the police twice.  I would do it again.  Your home should be your family's sanctuary, and tolerating violence undercuts that.  I am happy that DH and I drew this line in our contingency plan, because when you are in the middle of an incident, it is difficult to know which way is up.

Best wishes and prayers.  [/quote]

NP here. This post saddens me as I see my son will be this. He's been difficult since age 3. We have tried EVERYTHING: therapy, IEPs, medication. He's now 12. Sometimes I get so angry that I'm pouring everything into a kid who I know will end up like this. But we keep trying.

OP. Find a good sleepover camp you can send him to this summer. Mine did a 2 week camp, hated it. But I.GOT.A.BREAK. It really recharged me and has gotten me through till now (next winter break he's going somewhere). I sold it to him as a chance to unplug and try new things. But it's really our family respite.

Don't listen to the nay sayers. They have no idea.

My thoughts are with you. Big hug.[/quote]

If you don't want him around, send him to military school.  [/quote]

I'm the parent who sent her son to 2 WEEKS camp. All my kids attend sleepaways, my girls love it. Ok, hate was a bit strong. My son did not like his because the water was freezing cold (NC mountains n June). Other than that the camp was "boring".

Nothing wrong with kids going away to let parents catch our breath. A 2 week camp is not the same as military school. But we all know that.

OP, I agree with the pp who suggested collaborative problem solving and lots of praise. [/quote]

[b]Sending your kid off to a camp for 2 weeks to get a break is not helping the underlying issue.  It is just you rather not dealing with it and counting down the days until he goes away to make it thru the next year.   If you aren't going to parent him correctly, send him to military or boarding school, so they will.   Or get a backbone and raise your kid correctly.  Otherwise he is a danger to himself and others, and you will be left to blame.  [/quote][/b]

The bolded is harsh, and ignorant. I am a new poster here. Have some compassion for the posters dealing with these issues. Do not judge until you have been through it, too.[/quote]

Sometimes people spinning around in a circle and not sure what to do, need harsh.  It is not a bad thing.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics