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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I felt the exact same way when my kids were your age.  I couldn't figure out how two smart people with all those degrees had produced such average kids.  I also thought that since i was home it was my job to make my kids smart and competitive.  I suspect that that's what you're doing -- You say "I have always excelled in everything I have done."  The problem is that little kids (and big kids) aren't projects, they're people.

I also recall thinking that my staying home was a waste of time if all I was going to be doing was producing average kids.  I couldn't get past the notion that I was staying home to work on a project, a project which I could control.

Ultimately, I went back to work and wrote several books and got tenure as a professor, and this was great because it allowed me to distinguish between my work, which was my project, and my family, which was not my project, but a really important part of my life.

Here's what nobody's going to tell you:
1.  It's okay to take some time to mourn the fantasy child you had in your head.  THe one that was going to be composing amusing little stories in French when he was four, that wasn't going to throw the Suzuki violin at the wall and break it, that was going to be blonde and have an English accent.  (I have no idea where my fantasy child came from!)

2.  Don't do stuff with your kids that you actually hate because you think you have to as their mom.  YOu're not actually legally required to watch Barney, to learn all the lyrics to Frozen, to develop a keen interest in little kid soccer.  Find some things you actually ENJOY to do with our four year old -- not counting to 20, but going for walks in the woods, or taking an art class, or whatever works for you.

3.  Stop comparing your kids to other people's kids.  A lot of these other moms are lying anyway.  
Develop some stock phrases for when other parents brag about their kids.  "OH, how marvelous for you."

You don't need to decide now what you're going to do with the rest of your life.  DOn't feel guilty if you're not good at SAHM'ing.  I was terrible at it and my kids love me anyway.  I might not have made dinner every night but I took them along on some pretty cool research trips.[/quote]

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