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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I assume that everyone here responding would insist that their children use their words when confronting a peer, so why is it that so many of you are just fine with the BIL angrily grabbing at a four year old girl's legs to the point that she is in tears?  He didn't say, "please don't stand on the couch" or "get off the couch" or even "get off the damn couch."  He said "No, no!" and then grabbed her.  Do all your kids hop to attention the instant you say "no!" and do exactly what you're asking them to read your mind about?  Or are they lost in their own thoughts doing their own thing and it takes them a second to process?  I'm guessing the latter.  That's normal four YO behavior.  Even when doing something that upon reflection they should know not to do.

If he had unemotionally picked her up and set her down, that's no problem.  But getting worked up about a four year old on the arm of your sofa and then grabbing at her when she's clearly scared of you and trying to get away is completely unacceptable.

The fact that he CAME AND APOLOGIZED should tell everyone what they need to know about this interaction.  He was clearly in the wrong or he wouldn't have done so.

This man is clearly not in control of his temper.  I feel sorry for his kids.[/quote]

If my 4 year old was standing on someone's couch, I would be fine if someone removed him. He absolutely knows that isn't the right way to act, so he doesn't get warnings to comply. [/quote]

I'm the first PP here.  And so would I.  Except after removing her, he was angrily grabbing at her.  That I would NOT be fine with.  [/quote]

I wouldn't be wild about it, but I also wouldn't freak out. The adults acted badly here. All of them. [/quote]

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