Reply to DD 16 is involved in a sexual relationship

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP again.  DD and her boyfriend split the cost of the doctor's visit and prescription - DD told me that she insisted on this.  So I never saw an insurance statement/doctor's bill.

Now that this is the situation, telling me what I should or shouldn't have done is not helpful - it is what is is and I have been successful in "parenting" a successful student and disciplined dancer who never had a curfew because she voluntarily comes home early!  She is also a very kind, generous and popular girl.

But even for the more puritanical parents - what if anything should I do now?  [/quote]

I'm a little confused, OP - do you object to her having sex in her bedroom or not?  You just keep saying you're shocked but not that you disapprove or that you wish she wouldn't.  I think you should figure that out - we all have different views on our kids and sex, obviously.

My two cents - your daughter is already having sex and she sounds responsible about it, so I doubt you could get her to stop now.  SI think she may be overplaying how responsible she is about it, though and 16 year olds do stupid things all the time.  I'd sit her and the boyfriend own together (I don't care how awkward that is) and talk about missing birth control pills and STDs and how much a pregnancy would screw up both of their lives.  I'd scare the crap out of them so that they would take every precaution with the birth control and do it right.

Then I'd set some ground rules about where/when they can have sex in your house according to whatever makes you comfortable.  And lastly, I would talk to the boyfriend and tell him you're going to tell his parents.  If he tells you his parents would freak out and make his life miserable, then perhaps you can consider not telling them.  But I think you owe it to his parents to tell him now that you know so that they can give him whatever parenting advice they want to about this.  And so that they can know to set sex groundrules in their house.

All of this will be SUPER awkward and you will not enjoy it.  But don't convince yourself that you don't need to do it just because it will be hard.[/quote]

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