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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. I've asked but honestly gotten nowhere. When I press the issue I get tears and it's just too much and counter-productive because we are getting nowhere. Hence why I started therapy. I am coming to terms with the choice despite not being thrilled about it. I am just hoping it passes.[/quote]

Are you listening to what she says when you ask her about it, and empathizing with and respecting her feelings and thoughts that she communicates to you? [b]Or are you dismissing any answer that isn't in agreement with your opinion on the matter? From this post, it sounds like you ask about her going back to paid work, she gives an answer that isn't the one you wanted to hear, you "press the issue" (i.e. keep asking the same question), and she cries because you are hounding her about the same thing over and over and not even listening to or caring about her answer. [/b]

That may or may not be what's happening. And you have extremely valid points and feelings of your own. I'm just pointing out that the root of your problem is a communication problem with your wife, not a money/work problem. Nothing will get better for either of you until you can communicate and really listen to and understand and respect each other's feelings and thoughts.[/quote]

+1.  She isn't going to talk with you unless you are truly willing to hear what she is saying, even if it isn't what you want to hear.  You need to work with your own therapist on your listening skills.  No wonder she's crying-- SAHM isn't a good fit for her, having two little kids is exhausting, her marriage is in trouble, her husband is not listening, and finding a job is really hard when you have been out of the workforce and have family responsibilities.  Boo hoody hoo it isn't what you planned, back when both of you were young and energetic and had no clue what parenting is really like.  Nobody has the right to the life they planned on having.

It sounds like you will accept nothing other than having her go back to work, regardless of what she says, so you're being pretty unilateral yourself.  Yet you still haven't explained how she can work with your current job being un-family-friendly.  How many days a month can you miss for kid stuff?  Can you miss work on short notice if a kid wakes up in the morning with a fever?  You need to get real about the logistics before you start making demands of your wife.[/quote]

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