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[quote=MarriedManHunting] [i]Thicker ones feel ten times better than thin ones, even if it's long[/i]
Mmmm,  Thank you for reminding me that I have a Dick women crave, lol.  Short but ever so thick.

My 2 affairs were beautiful women over the last 2 yrs.  One was a 10, plain and simply out of this world beautiful bod that was 20 yrs younger.  The other one was exceptional for being 49. She was the kinkiest woman I've ever known.  We did everything sexually you can think of.
 
However, the beauty and newness had nothing to do with why I cheated.   It was for one reason only.  Lack of Sex.  I grew tired of begging and hoping over 30 yrs after having sex avg of 2-3x yr.  In the last 2 yrs, something happened with her, and now we have sex 2-3 mth.  That's a HUGE increase for me.  BUT, it's too little too late.  I have such huge resentment that I was denied all those yrs.  I'm looking for another Affair now while I can still get erect.  I'm not going to let her steal the rest of what sex life I have.  2-3x a mth, while I have to JO every day, just doesn't cut it.

I still have huge issues of guilt because I'm just not wired to cheat.  My DW is my best friend and it kills me to do this to her.  I couldn't even get erect until after several sessions with my AP because of the guilt.  It really does make me so sad and angry that it has come to this.  I just have to keep reminding myself that my DW is also the woman that has caused me immeasurable pain by rejection after all those yrs.  Sometimes I could just cry thinking about it all.  All those thousands of times of having to masturbate, it damaged my soul beyond help.  Sometimes the Anger about it is just sooo much to handle.  I can't leave her though,  I love her and never want her to be hurt.  I'm going to hold her tight and let her know she means everything to me when she's on her death bed.

Is she ever catches me,  and it's not plausible for me to deny it, I'm going to tell her the truth.  It was all about sex.  Divorce me if you must, but just know that I still love you.  Now you DW can make the hard choice I had to make.  I just hope you'll live with the pain of 30 yrs like I did before I took action.  By that time, I might be dead, LOL

Thank you for reading and helping me to get this off my chest.  Although no matter how many times I write about it, it never seems to help me.[/quote]

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