Reply to Feeling left behind —— BF isn’t committing

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m new here so please be kind.
 I’m 26, and all my friends from high school and college are getting engaged and married. I’m currently overseas for a wedding of a close friend.

I can’t help but feel some jealousy, not maliciously, as my boyfriend of 3.5 years, who is 34, claims it's too early in our relationship and we should wait a few more years. However, I feel that 3.5 years is plenty of time, and I think he's avoiding any commitment despite saying that he does, leaving me worried about when he’ll want to get engaged.

SO YOU HAVE BEEN WITH HIM SINCE VERY YOUNG, 22 OR SO. I CAN'T IMAGINE YOU REALLY HAVE MUCH IN THE WAY OR SERIOUS OR NEAR SERIOUS PARTNERS TO COMPARE HIM TO.

HIS CLAIM OF TOO SOON MEANS HE DOESN'T WANT TO MARRY. HAS NO PASSION TO MARRY YOU.  EVEN IF YOU GOT ENGAGED IT WOULD NOT NECESSARILY LEAD TO A PROMPT MARRIAGE, JUST A VERY LONG ENGAGEMENT.

YOUR INSTINCTS ARE RIGHT.

My boyfriend earns a great salary, and we live together. He is genuinely the best partner I've ever had, and I believe he would be an excellent husband and father, and I thought I’d be married by now because I want at least 5 or 6 babies so I can’t wait much longer and am unsure what’s taking his so long.

HE JUST ISN'T THAT IN TO GETTING MARRIED. HE JUST ISN'T THAT IN TO COMMITTING TO MARRIAGE AND MANY CHILDREN WITH YOU.  YOU SEE HIM AS A PROVIDER. HE DOESN'T SEE YOU AS A WIFE AND MOTHER OF HIS KIDS.

I don’t want to leave and restart.
YOU MUST LEAVE. BUT DON'T THINK OF IT AS RESTARTING. THINK OF IT AS STARTING BEING YOUR OWN PERSON.

How much longer should I wait?
0

What should I do?

DON'T MOVE IN. SAY YOU AREN'T ON THE SAME PAGE AND WANT TO BE ON YOUR OWN. THIS ASSUMES YOU HAVE A JOB? OR ARE YOU A LIVE IN GF WITH NO JOB OR JOB PROSPECTS?

[/quote]

I haven't read all the responses, but very kindly as I can please see my responses in CAPS ABOVE IN YOUR TEXT[/quote]

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