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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  This thread was a bit hijacked by the person with the father who had multiple relationships.   I am truly sorry that you are stuck in this situation,  but my life and my boyfriend are very different from yours.

I actually have a  good relationship with my boyfriend's daughter and perhaps I didn't relay this here correctly.   I am just trying to understand her a bit and receive feedback from others, but if things remain the way they are now,  then it will be fine.  She has a Mom and her Mom and Dad will be there for all her special events.   I don't ever want to be in the middle of this.  I don't know what the future holds,  but I will continue to treat her nicely and I will also be there for her if she ever needs me. Who knows...  I may be the one left someday and I would most definitely keep in touch and make sure that she feels cared for (as well as her sibling).  I know loss and pain being widowed and losing dear family members.   Sometimes having extended family can be wonderful.   My boyfriend's ex-wife actually likes me.

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I think it's really infantilizing to assume it's because of the divorce, even if your boyfriends says so. Maybe she's sad that she's going to have to deal with you and your relatives forever.[/quote]

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