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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Honestly, OP, my advice would be to accept her, whatever her feelings may be, and not try to fix it. If she feels like you're going to monitor her every facial expression and be constantly trying to make her feel comfortable because you *think* you know what the problem is, that's going to really annoy her.

You don't actually know why she's feeling un-enthused about this. It could be any number of reasons. For example, I hate when my new stepmom is announcing that she's sooooo happy in her marriage, because I know what a selfish jerk my dad can be and I think he's taking advantage of her and it will get worse. It's not because I wish my mom were still married to him-- I'm thrilled my mom got out when she could. It could be that your boyfriend is not as happy in the relationship as you think he is, and his daughter somehow knows this, so she feels awkward. It could be that the daughter doesn't want to have to spend time with your adult son and she may have very good reasons for that. Who knows.

One of the hassles of being an ACOD is that if you don't like the new person your parent marries, you're assumed to have divorce-related issues and need therapy. No other reason is allowed. It's okay to dislike your in-laws, or anyone else who marries into your family, but to protect the conscience of divorced people, no dislike of a new partner by adult children can be treated as legitimate.[/quote]

You are really projecting and you really seem to want other people to be as miserable as you are.  [b]My boyfriend is very happy in our relationship and this is why he wants to marry me.[/b]  [/quote]

You're missing the point. The point is that you might be correct that something is a little off socially, but it might not be what you think it is. It could be anything. Don't assume this is about the divorce. There could be any number of reasons.[/quote]

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