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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here -  thank you all for the feedback. It’s been worse this past year, and I’ve had a lot of honest conversations with my kids about it. I told them that it’s not OK how he’s acted the past year, but also that we had so many good years with him and he’s struggling with something and we should stick by him because we love him. He also never gets upset with the kids. Usually when he has his tantrums, I’m the only one around. It’s like I’m a safe person where he can just let it all out, which I know is unfair. My kids are not scared of him and will absolutely put him in his place when needed. 
[b]
I grew up with an angry dad, who I still have a good relationship with, but I was also scared of him. He also didn’t provide me with emotional support or feelings ever. My husband does know our kids and is very involved and does give them emotional support.[/b] [/quote] Once I got out of my emotionally abusive marriage I realized I was drawn to my ex because his behavior was familiar to me. One of my parents has many of the same traits as ex so it was what I knew and it didn't scare me. Are you in therapy yourself? I feel like you're making a lot of excuses for his terrible behavior but it doesn't matter if he's mostly great if the 10% of the time that he's not great he's a monster. I'm wishing you the best![/quote]

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