Reply to If you’re happily married 16 plus years what do you attribute it to? What factors?

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[quote=Anonymous]Also, why would you go to church apparently to "work on being closer to God" and not work on being closer to your spouse by doing things that would please them if they point out things are causing problems? Usually, God in religions accepts you but doesn't just expect you to be the same from week to week. Just because we are an adult, doesn't mean we never need correction. You don't go immediately from being a child to being a fully functioning adult especially as life changes. In fact, it's one of the primary reasons for being religious and going to church.

What I've noticed from people who are divorced is that either the person is lying to them for years and they are in denial till they aren't, or they are the person lying or mentally ill in some way and have either mentally or physically left the marriage, or the person is putting up with abuse for years till they start having health and safety issues themselves or they are selfish and think they deserve more. This whole idea that you go into marriage somehow completely ready and perfect as a marriage partner is flawed unless you are good at compartmentalizing. Some of the younger generations don't even know how to live alone and adult much less do that with a partner or with children. I assume most good marriages at least have a mix of acceptance, compromise, and hard work.[/quote]

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