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Tweens and Teens
Reply to "Do any parents out there know their kids are the mean ones?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Oldest 2 boys are probably mean. They exclude other boys and hold weak ones in semi-open disdain. We didn’t teach them to be this way but it came to them naturally. They’re not cruel, though. The funny thing is they’re rewarded for their behavior by the other boys and girls. [/quote] And you know you have to rein it in, instead of writing that out as if you were proud of them? [/quote] Disagree. They’re not cruel and it helps them socially. They were raised to be strong, so not sure why I’d try to teach them something different after all these years. I am proud of their strength, and I should be. DH and I made choices to raise good men, and we got what we wanted. [/quote] How does it show strength when they are disdainful of weaker children??? I see plenty of strong young men around my children's school and they have nothing to prove to anyone, no need to show off by bullying others. I see kids like your sons and they don't look strong, they look ridiculous. And if you're not sure why you'd teach your sons to be something other than "mean" (your words, in your first post), then you're probably beyond help. [/quote] Good question. As DH explains it, boys need hierarchy. Our two oldest exclude those who try to buck it. I should have been more clear. This forum has a feminine take on protecting the weak. However, because my boys are strong, I don’t always agree with that reflex. Moms I know with strong sons think the way I do. [/quote] You and your “strong” sons are repulsive.[/quote] Yah this is gross. My son is handsome, tall, great athlete so I’m really on top his behavior to be the kind, inclusive one. He’s friends with all the circles of kids, and he gets along with a lot of different personalities and appreciates his friends for the differences. I’m proud of him for not chasing social status or seeing people through this hierarchy. It’s an ugly way to live. [/quote]
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