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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]"This is a really good point. Are most divorce lawyers familiar with this sort of stuff or does it require counsel from a trusts and estates type attorney as well?

I assume however there is no real structure to make the straying husband agree to this, or even if he agrees to ultimately pass on a certain set of funds or percent amount to the original children, nothing prevents him from spending large on him and new wife while still alive?"

Divorce lawyers can be great and some can suck. Best to ask around for recommendations from people who had to use one. Do not every just go with a random person.

Here is what I did:

Required a life insurance policy worth $750K (it's a universal policy with a cash value that he now no longer has to make payments on because the interest it generates covers the amount needed to keep it active) with DC as the beneficiary. That guarantees that DC gets something when his dad dies, regardless of whatever some new wife or her kids do. Life insurance policies pay out to the beneficiary regardless of what a will says.

I required language in his will granting DC some specific assets (all separate property even if he remarries).

I specified exactly how much money he put into the 529 each month until DC reached college age. I set a minimum amount that he had to provide for college even if the stock market didn't do well and the 529 tanked. All of this was in the settlement agreement.

I didn't say anything about how soon he could date, live with, or marry someone new. All I felt made sense to control was the money that my child would have access to.

[/quote]

The question is, what leverage did you have to get him to do it?  I would never agree to this, and here is why:  life happens.  Even if you are married to someone, you are not guaranteed a certain lifestyle for life - disasters happen, disabilities happen, federal RIFs happen when you are in your 50s.  If someone loses their livelihood, the family has to adjust.

I divorced in my 30s with two young kids.  They are now both young adults, their education was paid for, etc, I supported them and helped them launch.  I am now in my 50s and disabled.  I still work while I can, but my financial priority now is myself, my second spouse and our minor child.  I would not be paying into a universal life policy for a capable adult if I couldn't guarantee a college education for their sibling.  Luckily, I raised my older kids well, and they agree.[/quote]

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