Reply to My parents both passed this past year and several old supposedly good friends

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[quote=Anonymous]First of all, I'm sorry for your loss.

As others have said... when the elderly pass away, many consider it a reality of life and not a tragedy.  I'm assuming because you're posting on the eldercare forum that your parents were elderly.  Yes, it does deserve a text/phone call/email.  In my experience... if there friend wants more support after I initially reach out, I'm there.  Some do, some don't.  Everyone is different.

I'm not sure paper cards are really a thing anymore.  Flowers seem outdated to me too, not something I've seen much of but maybe I'm wrong. 
 Food is more of a thing if you actually need food and it's a hassle to get it, like in young kids' example or if you are hosting a large group of relatives and food delivery isn't an option or needs coordination.  I have seen food trains when a young parent dies and there are young children in the mix, but not when the "child" is fully an adult.

Also, a lot of people want to respect privacy, and there is a reason for this.  When MIL died, one of DH's friends was insistent that we go to dinner.  DH wasn't really up for it, but agreed to go.  It would have been more sensitive of the friend to have been a little insistent.

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