Reply to Having Kids Is Overrated and Most People Have No Idea Until It’s Way Too Late

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Reply to "Having Kids Is Overrated and Most People Have No Idea Until It’s Way Too Late"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I hear you OP. I started to feel this way around the time my kids went to college. I thought I had it all figured out when they were younger.

It’s kind of depressing. Of all the people I know maybe 5-10% actually enjoy spending time with their older parents. The rest find them annoying. Not great odds! I just spent the weekend with my elderly parents and it’s hard especially when in you’re in the sandwich. [/quote]

OP here. Exactly. This is really it. People always focus on how hard it is to be a parent when your kids are little. And it is hard but it’s also often very gratifying too because they love you and think you’re awesome.

But in reality how many adults adore spending time with their aging parents? They may love them and feel they need to respect them. And hopefully as a parent you’re proud of your adult child. I think for most people it’s kind of a mixture.

But we never really talk about that when we talk about having kids. And I think it’s almost impossible for people to accurately imagine their lives too far in the future.

Right now my kid is leaving and doesn’t seem very thankful for anything I’ve done for them—which is a lot. So that’s why I’m all…this crap wasn’t worth it. Of course it goes back and forth personally.

But I really do look at some of these young couples and want to say…come be a parent to my 18 year old getting ready for college for a weekend and see if this is what you had in mind? Your DINK life might seem really good. Are you sure you want to mess with that?[/quote]

OP, I couldn’t stand my parents when I first went off to college. But with the benefit of space from each other I began to appreciate them and am now very close with them, particularly my mom. We now travel together at times and text/talk often. Because of me they get to be grandparents and absolutely adore them. I love getting to see my kids have a relationship with them.

DH is close with his parents as well. They are local and come to a lot of our kids’ soccer games and such.

Who your child is at 18 at a stage in life when they are supposed to naturally want to separate from you is not necessarily reflective of who they will be at 30 or 40 so I wouldn’t give up hope yet.[/quote]

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